Wednesday, September 26, 2012

The dream in my head vs. reality (and a laugh for good measure)

Dream: Because Little C has a doctors appointment this morning I don't have to set my alarm for my normal routine and I can let the sounds of my happy babbling baby wake me up instead of the annoying alarm.

Reality: My natural "body clock" knew it was my normal time to arise and instead of getting much needed time to sleep a little bit longer I was wide awake before my son made a peep.

Dream: Since I have two whole hours to be at home before leaving for C's appointment I will have a relaxing morning with plenty of time to get myself and baby ready, to spend playing with my son, to blissfully make him breakfast and even get to sip on some hot coffee while reading through my fav blogs.

Reality: Two hours allowed me time to barely pull myself together, make C scrambled eggs that he wanted nothing to do with, chased him around with a dropper full of his medication which he refused to take, two sips of coffee, zero play time, chased him around again as he refused to go with me for a diaper change, and left the house looking like a tornado blew through it. 

But I did get out the door on time!  Whoop!

Dream: Since it will be a rainy and chilly day I will wear one of my most stylish maternity dresses to work paired with my super cute knee high boots that I've been anxious to break out of the closet knowing I only have a month left where my pregnant body will allow me to rock heels.  I will look like a glowing, hip preggo as I casually waltz my son into his doctor appointment.

Reality: All the running around I did to get us out of the house had my hormones raging into a ball of furry.  I was sweating profusely and it my makeup started melting off my face.  I raced into the reception area of the pediatricians office red faced with beads of sweat collecting on my forehead and upper lip.  Additionally, the boots were one of the worst ideas I've ever had.  My back is angry and my sciatic nerve has wished death upon me.

Dream: Since I will have a late start into work my day will fly by and I will be out of there in no time!

Reality: I started playing the time game pretty early on, which isn't a good sign.  You know, where you just put your head down and tackle your action items in hopes to get lost in productivity making sure you don't look at the clock, assuming hours have whizzed by you.  But then, when you do let yourself peek at the clock only 15 minutes have past!!  Oi.

Completely off subject... the time game reminds me of a Chris Rock bit.  Hubby and I love stand-up comedy and Chris Rock is definitely one of our favs.  In case you've had a day like mine and you're in need of a good laugh I thought I'd share his explanation of the time game with you.

Disclaimer: If you aren't familiar with Chris Rock I will let you know he does curse a lot and he is your typical comedian.  Meaning, if he says something seemingly offensive, it probably is, but for the sake of a laugh. 

So here you go!  I hope you find it as hysterical as I do! :)



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