Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Worry, worry, worry

(photo credit)
I'm finding this a constant thing as a parent.  By nature I'm not too much of a worry wart to the point that it is all-consuming or paralyzing.  Unless of course I'm being asked to jump off of a cliff into a body of water.  Where some find this fun and invigorating, I find it terrifying and will not jump no matter what!  "C'mon Kendra, the water feels great!"  "Nothing is going to happen to you, you will be fine!"  "Seriously, Kendra. We've all jumped now and no one is left to help you down.  You have to jump. There is no other choice!"  I can hear the shouting now... "JUMP ALREADY!"  It sends chills down my spine.  Stupid cliff jumping...

Wait, wasn't I talking about worrying??  I clearly haven't had my pregnancy allotted caffeine yet for the day.  Bare with me!

The worrying started on March 31st, 2011.  The day my son was born.  As a newborn the worrying was focused mostly on whether or not he was breathing.  Then it shifted to worrying about breastfeeding.  Even his belly button/umbilical cord thingy was worrisome at times.  From breastfeeding it was whether or not we needed to supplement with formula or when to give him rice cereal.  When do I stop breastfeeding?  That poo looked different from all the other poo's.  Is this normal?  Was that normal?

From infancy we surged ahead to toddlerhood.  Why is he throwing a fit?  Is he hurting, teething, hungry, tired?  Why is he rubbing his ear?  He must have an ear infection.  Why is he banging his head on the floor?  Why won't he eat {insert a particular food} now?  He used to love it!

(photo credit)
The worrying never stops!!!  It is hard because more often than not, there is nothing to worry about.  He is fine.  He is healthy.  He is happy.  Almost everything has an explanation, a solution, or solves itself.  But as a mom I can't stop worrying about his well-being.  Will it ever get better?  Should I not be worrying?

The latest is Little C's weight.  At his 15 month check-up we were told he is in the 30th percentile for weight.  That was down from the 50th percentile.  The doctor didn't seem too concerned she just said it could have been from when he was sick and just to keep an eye on it.  Well he just had another stomach bug and this morning I was looking at him and his PJ's were practically hanging off of his little body!!  The same PJ's that just recently we were laughing at because his "budda belly" was hanging out of the bottom of the shirt and they were super tight on him.  :(  He eats like a champ but isn't putting on the pounds!

Want to know what the #1 thing you should NOT do if you are a worried parent???  Google what ever it is you are worried about!!!  I mean it.  Don't do it.  It is amazing what you can find and how it seems every single symptom of a terrible life-threatening disease your precious baby can have.  As I frantically called my hubby to tell him that Little C could have cystic fibrosis all I heard was laughter on the other end.  "How can you be laughing at a time like this?!?!?"  I demanded.  This is serious!  Hubby assured me that he does not have cystic fibrosis and if I was so concerned I should call and speak to someone from the Pediatrician's office.  Ahhhhhh, right.  He wants me to do the logical thing.  Darn Hubby, he's always right!

So my burning question is whether or not the worrying is good?  Not the over-the-top crazy diagnosis type worrying, but the keeping in tune with my little munchkin and being aware, type of worrying.  I've heard so many stories about moms being told not to worry about something but that mom insisted there was something wrong with their child and turns out she was right!  A mother's intuition can be a strong thing but where do I draw the line between a conscious well-informed mom and a worry wart mom?   

All I do know is that Little C is eating healthy carbs and ice cream for dinner!

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