So many things...

There is so much swimming around in my head right now. Mostly because I am very tired and when I am very tired I tend to get a bit out of sorts and start over thinking/stressing about things that need not be over thought/stressed about. Many of these things are the same from my last brain dump, but they are still around...

In no particular order:

• Daycare dilemma - we found a solution for P-Nut until a spot at Little C's daycare opens up. This should have me jumping for joy but instead it has posed a new set of dilemmas. More on this later...
• Breast milk - So. many. things. about breast milk. My supply seems to be dropping. My stash for going back to work is slow going. My daughter still has terrible gas and knowing it is my fault is really messing with my head.
• Maternity leave is almost over - The very thought is overwhelming.
• C's bday is on Easter and I am in full-on bday planning mode - This isn't too stressful because I am super excited, I just have so much to do.
• P-Nut has a cough - A cough!!! She is only 2 1/2 months old and is sick! And here I thought breast milk was supposed to get all Chuck Norris on germs and kick their butts to the curb. Luckily she doesn't have a fever but the cough is keeping her up at night and her nose is super stuffed. We know all the tactics for handling this I just feel terrible for her.

In other news, I had a couple of triumphs this past week! Little C was home from daycare ALL WEEK and I had the calendar jam packed with play dates, appointments, etc. There were times when help was enlisted but there was also a ton of time that I had both babies all by myself. I have to say that it most certainly kicked my ass but I was also very proud of how well I did. :: pats self on back ::

The second triumph was my very first time breastfeeding in public. I usually have a pumped bottle on hand when we are out and will resist breastfeeding even if I'm engorged. I simply have not been comfortable to do it... yet. But this Saturday I said, "screw it!" There was no more hiding, no more feeling insecure and I did what had to be done. Of course, P-Nut wasn't having it under the "hooter hider" and she was only latched for maybe 5 minutes, but at least I got that first time out of the way and it will only get easier for here on out. Right? It will get easier??

Lastly, I wanted to give a shout out to my Mom. She took two days off of work to spend with me and the kids and we had a wonderful time! One day it was just me, P-Nut and Mom and we spent the day shopping. The second day mom came to my house and we were visited by my grandparents and one of my aunts then she stayed all afternoon and we laughed, stared at my precious children and even shed a few tears.

I love you, Mom. Saying, "thank you" never seems like enough. Watching you with my kids is a treat and we are all so lucky for your kindness, generosity, and unending love.