I am behind on life. I feel like I am in a cloudy fog and I'm hoping that it lifts very soon.
I don't mean a depressed type of fog, I mean a sleep deprived, don't know what day it is, haven't showered, can barely process a complete sentence, type of fog. And because of my current state I'm behind on so many things and feeling like the things I AM tending to are not getting done 100%.
I am behind on "thank you" notes, laundry, chores in general. I need a haircut like you wouldn't believe, a pedicure like whoa and I need to shave my legs before I inflict bodily harm if Hub's leg brushes by mine.
My mother-in-law came by today to watch Little C and P-Nut for an hour or two so we could "get out for a bit." I pumped a bottle so she was armed and Hubs and I set out for a romantic outing to... the grocery store. Yup, behind on groceries too.
In addition to mundane chores and household "stuff," I'm feeling the most behind on time with Little C. My patience with him has been very low and I feel beyond guilty for that. He has had to watch more TV than ever before and therefore, more guilt.
I'm behind on updates here on the blog and I'm hoping to get back into a normal groove again soon.
I try not to worry about most of this because I know it all comes with good reason... I have a newborn. However, not being able to take care of everything is driving me crazy!
The hardest part is for sure Little C. At the end of my pregnancy I was so uncomfortable and unable to play with him the way he was used to. Now I'm tied to P-Nut for breastfeeding and my play time with him is limited once again. I'm trying very hard to be there for him as much as possible but it never feels like enough and that makes me feel like a bad mom. I know I'm not, I just can't shake the guilt.
Things really are going well for the most part and I know the fog will lift very soon. P-Nut is progressing so very well and before long I hope things start smoothing out a bit and I am able to accomplish more.
As for now I'm riding this out. Enjoying the precious moments when they present themselves, getting through the tough moments as best I can, and I WILL shave my legs tomorrow or bust!!!!
Hey Kendra- I love reading your blog and catching up with your sweet family! We just had our second babe about 7 weeks ago and all I have to say is AMEN to this post! So tired and I wish I could hire a 12 year old to entertain my toddler. I can't believe I thought this was hard the first time. It is much harder the second time! :) Hang in there- I am sure you are doing great!
ReplyDeleteElaine
PS- I am NERVOUS about the last time I shaved my legs!
Congrats on your newst addition! I'm glad to hear I'm in good company. You are right, much harder the second time! I finally shaved my legs, how bout you? ;)
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